Category Archives: photography

Ah snap.

(To state the obvious) I haven’t really been posting much lately.  Its not for a lack of wanting to, its mostly contributed to a lack of physically sitting down and doing it.  I feel like I have been streaming consciously tons of ideas I have been dying to write about but when it comes time to actually articulate written thought, I have either forgotten the main premise or simply don’t have enough time to devote to saying what I want to say in a orderly or concise way.

I also have spent some time traveling this past month which has kept me away from the computer and as luck would have it, I forgot to bring my camera along for the journey.  I am terrible about this!  It makes me ashamed to even call myself a former professional photographer since I so rarely make it a priority to shoot these days.

I have some ideas for creating some scheduling/routine to my blogging so I can be a little more consistent in posting come fall (September), with a little wiggle room for random posting of course, but while I take some time to flesh this out I have come up with an idea as to not neglect my corner of the internet.

For the next 35 days, this will be a photo blog.  Each day will be simply a photo submission.  Each title of my post will indicate the theme for that days photo and which number in the count it is.  This should lead me right into Labor day when I make my first “real” post again!  Anyone else want to join me for 35 days of photo blogging?

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Sunday Snapshot [7.12.09]

Today’s title really should be “Room with a view FAIL”.  At the beginning of the year they began construction on the main road that runs through our neighborhood.  It has since worked its way down to our section of the road.  We live on the corner of the main road and a residential street and ironically, the construction begins at our house, so our street has become the detour road for all traffic.  What this also means is we get have lost our lovely view from our only two living room windows and it has been replaced with dirt, crushed concrete, and a port-a-potty!

Cat crane/diggerIts just feet from the house!potty

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Filed under photography, picture post, Snapshot Sunday

Birthday Photo Shoot

I finally recieved my CD from the photographer of Mirabelle’s 2nd birthday photos.  The shoot went better than I could have imagined.  For 30 bucks she spent fifteen minutes with her, we did 2 different outfits, and she allowed her to walk around while capturing her in her natural state.  She gave us all the original images as well as 4 different artistic edits of each image.  Here are a few favorites from the shoot!

Mirabelle 2 yrs.old school edittutu runtutu2

This is my favorite!

This is my favorite!

If your local..check out Wendy Sky Alsup of A Stolen Moment Photography for your next photo shoot!

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Filed under photography, picture post, product review

Birthday 2.0

My baby-girl is a baby no more!! As of 11:06 pm last evening, Mirabelle turned two! Its amazing been such an amazing journey thus far. I had so many wonderful and joyous expectations about motherhood and all have been exceeded!

There have been a ton of hurdles and unexpected challenges, but its fun to look back now and laugh at that sleep deprived, inexperienced version of myself and see all we have survived and learned. The newest “accomplishment” is that Mirabelle is, for the most part, sleeping through the night. This has only been happening for about a week now so I am still holding my breath on this one. For the last two years I would refer to her as my “broken sleeper” and I swore she would never sleep soundly as long as she lived!! Oh..the comedy of a tired Momma! Now she is sleeping like an angel. Looking back I realize that 2 years of getting up a few extra times a night to nurse, co-sleeping, the whole lot of it..it was TOTALLY worth it. So I lost some sleep..I got to spend more time physically and emotionally connecting with my daughter because that is her unique design and her needs at the time. It does however make having subsequent children seem MUCH more possible now in comparison to a season where it seemed near impossible!

In reflecting on her true BIRTH day, I realized I am truly healing (not past tense yet) from the emotional scars of my C-section. It is a huge relief. This year, like last, I replayed the moments in my mind leading up to my surprise induction, my 30 hour labor, and then my emergency C-section. After that mental account, no tears fell from these eyes and I could only smile and thank God for my precious gift! What a blessing she is to us.

#3 here we come…

Mirabelle Ani just minutes old!

Mirabelle Ani just minutes old!

Mirabelle's 1st birthday picture.

Mirabelle's 1st birthday picture.

Mirabelle's 2nd Birthday photo shoot!

Mirabelle's 2nd Birthday photo shoot!

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Filed under celebration, co-sleeping, life as a parent, photography, picture post

Words that heal

I met with a friend the other day for lunch.  A conversation about her work as a doula and current training to become a midwife somehow lead us to talking about my birth story.

The previous day I had to squeeze my way onto my midwives schedule for a GYN appointment because of some severe lower-abdomnial pain I was having.  After a very long day at their office…a pelvic and an ultrasound later, there was no known cause for my pain!  All the floating hypotheses are: endometriosis, severe ovulatory pain, GI-related condition vs. GYN, or (and the one that emotionally scares me the most) possible adhesions caused by my C-Section.  The pain began to dissipate over the next couple days which makes ovulation likely the cause for my pain.

When she brought up the C-Section though as being a possibility for causing me my current discomfort and that, if it checked out to be adhesions, I would need surgery to remedy the problem, I lost it.  I still carry deep emotional scars from having my C-Section.  There have been times I have truly thought, “Praise God, I have finally moved on!”, and then something will jog my memory (a scent, like the massage lotion we used, or a song we listened to during labor) and bam…I feel all the hurt, and sadness, and feelings of failure rush back.

My midwife could tell I was holding back tears so she pulled me back into the office as the tears began to trickle down my cheeks.  This particular midwife was not with the practice when I gave birth to my daughter so I had to give some back story but I explained that I had read everything I could and I was so militant and ready for my all-natural birth and I felt like I wanted it more than anyone I had ever known.  I couldn’t understand how someone like me could have ended up the way I did!  I told her about the circumstances of my induction, but about the fact that I felt as if I should have questioned it because I didn’t know what my “low fluid” level was and what was “normal”.  She opened up my file right then and there and sure enough it was definitely low!  She said she would have made the same call and if I had demanded to go home, she would have kindly explained the risk of losing the baby.  I respected her answer and admitted that there is a good chance I was told all that the day of, but I think the minute I heard the word INDUCTION, all I heard is ‘YOU HAVE FAILED’!

As I continued talking to the midwife I told her about my feelings about how I felt that I had failed in my birth and that I didn’t ever once blame their office or the midwives who helped me in labor because I knew it was my failure and not theirs.  She stopped me and said “Shannon…YOU DIDN’T FAIL!”  She then asked something that was, I think, the key to this whole mess because the question alone wrecked me and opened a door to a place inside of me I had forgotten about.  She asked, “Did you take a birthing class from an instructor?”.   This question alone started me sobbing uncontrollably.  I could not even speak the woman’s name it gave me so much pain.  She then asked “Was it ‘SC’ with FBM Class?”, and all I could do was shake my head yes.  Finally I was able to get out in words how this leader poorly shared material but then asked me to perform for her the final night of class.  When I couldn’t, this prompted her to call me the next day and tell me how she was convinced I was not ready to give birth and that I was not going to do well.

In retelling this account to my friend over lunch she said something to me that has been quite revealing and healing at that: The paraphrase goes something like this… “You have to decide why your giving birth.  Are you doing it for the birth experience or for the baby?”

I truly believe still that during my pregnancy and even my labor, I was focused on Mirabelle alone.  It’s been since about 4am on June 29th, while I sat ALONE in my Recovery and Postpartum room waiting for my husband and daughter to join me that I turned inward and focused too hard on the loss of my ideal birth experience.

If the Lord ever blesses me again with a pregnancy, I need to focus on the life inside of me and birthing a child with a lifetime ahead of them, rather than merely that day, and making his/her life about that one experience.

1 day old Mirabelle

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Filed under birth story, photography, picture post, pregnancy

Snapshot Sunday (3.29.09)

Finally!  A Sunday where I am actually posting a photograph I have taken.  Friday we had some beautiful blow in..literally!  We had some mega winds in the evening Friday but it left us this weekend with blue skies and a lovely cool breeze.  It would have been criminal to spend a substantial amount of time indoors Saturday so we tossed around a few ideas and ended up heading downtown to Discovery Green park.  They have a plenty of free-roaming green space, entertainment, a playground, and lots of good summer attractions like a water fountain playground.  She loved the freedom to roam!  Here is a shot of Mirabelle and Daddy I couldn’t help but capture!

B & M taking a stroll Downtown

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Filed under local, photography, picture post

Sunday Snapshot (3.22.09)

Friday night when my husband got home from work Mirabelle was so excited to see her Daddy!  We had had a great day together and after spending much of the beginning of the week couped up in the house she was enjoying all the adventuresome fun we had been having on Thursday and Friday together.  While I was busy finishing up dinner the two of them headed out for a much appreciated “car ride” around the neighborhood.  Bill snapped this gem on his iphone and its most definitely my new favorite snapshot of the week!!

photo1

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